You, my good friend, have just established yourself as a higher level of human being, something more than the typical freeloader that infests this nefarious Internet. Take a moment to revel in your innate superiority over those philistine masses.

Ahem. Moving on. You want a POP account, do you? It'll cost you — but not much, not much at all. A POP account is $29.00 (USD). One time. That's it. No monthly, annual, or other form of recurring fee — just $29.00.

And for that $29.00 fee, you get one gigabyte of storage. (Gmail really ruined it for us.) And an e-mail address in a really fun domain. And incredibly aggressive spam filtering, built right in. (We can't guarantee you won't get any spam, but we're quite confident that you'll see very little.)

Now, we really, really, really prefer to use PayPal for the payment. If you're not familiar with PayPal, it's a totally free, secure system that allows you to use your credit card to send money to someone — in this case, that'd be us. (We have no relation to PayPal, incidentally, if you're wondering.)

As with the e-mail aliases, you can choose an address in any of the following domains. Each address will cost $29.00.

• microsuck.com
• fuckMicrosoft.com
• fuckWindows.com
• fuckWindows2000.com
• fuckWindowsXP.com
• windows-sucks.com
• fuckBillGates.com
• fuckBillGates.net
• fuckBillGates.org
• freemyPC.com
• freemyPC.net
• freemyPC.org

Our PayPal address is payments@ms-eradication.org. When you send your payment, include the following information in your comments:

• the e-mail address(es) you're ordering;
• an alternate e-mail address we can contact you at; and
• the password you want to use for your account.

If you don't currently have a PayPal account, sign up for one (it's free) at www.paypal.com. PayPal allows you to charge the money to a Visa or MasterCard, and there's no fees involved, either.

Once you have your account set up, your login ID will be your entire e-mail address (i.e., "user@windows-sucks.com", not just "user"), the password is what you initially selected, and the POP server is mail.ms-eradication.org. We don't offer an SMTP server, but you should be able to use your ISP's SMTP server without a problem.

The Public Internet
P. O. Box 602
The Crappy Blue-Collar Hellhole of Parlin, NJ 08859-0602
USA